There has been massive trauma in my life and I was abused as a child but I can't blame my childhood for this. I hope I'm not going totally gaga in my old age. I have wondered whether it's something like that but I hope 60 is too young for something like Alzheimer's and I do feel that I have to take responsibility for this.
A cruel fate, you were abused by mummy
And turned to comfort eating, hence your tummy
Diminutive of frame and short of arse
You donned the chef’s whites for your daily brass
To spite your wealthy gran you plied the trade
Of chop and filet, sauce and marinade
And selling sickly food gave you success
A string of restaurants, a posh address
You flattered Princess Di, your royal host
A portly jester bearing Melba toast
Some chefs are known to bully or harangue
You were emollient, a sweet meringue
You won the housewife’s heart with nanny’s food
Fawned to the rich but to the poor were rude
Beneath your sugared crust, sickly as cola
A pin-striped chancer in the latest Roller
No sylph and hardly blessed with film star looks
You joined the pantheon of TV cooks
A jealous, quarrelling gaggle, how they sneered
At your “squashed Bee Gee” face, your ginger beard
Recession hit, they laughed as you went down
And traded in a poorer part of town
You made them snigger with your poison leaf
And now, collared in Tesco, you’re a thief!
Apparently for figures of your station
Nicking stuff is just an aberration
It was not me, it must have been dementia
I am only guilty in absentia
The cruel abuse I suffered renders me
Immune from law, I’m seeking therapy
All utter tosh, you stole to fill your frame
Greed is greed. Now you should take the blame
No comments:
Post a Comment