A prayer for Conservative councillors

A COURT ruling banning prayers from being a part of formal council meetings has been slammed by councillors who claim that God helps them make important decisions.

Redbridge News

To the tune of Bank Robber (approximately) by the Clash

Make taxes lower for our pals
By depriving hospitals
Favour the wealthy, force the poor
To work much longer than before
To bigger bonuses says ‘yes’
While you destroy the NHS
Punish and ignore the sick
Privatise and cherry pick
The assets of the welfare state
While racking up the bankers' slate


May the days be long and dark
Especially in the closed-down park
May all the libraries be shut
Up with knowledge do not put
Close down every meals-on-wheels
Let the hungry live on eels
Keep the masses in their place

With booze and bingo and replace

Their services with charity

Call it the ‘Big Society’


Please God can you fill my gut

With frequent trips to Pizza Hut

Curse the left and bless the right

Let more beggars freeze at night

Fill the world with spleen and hate

Oppose an EU ‘super state’

Freedom and human rights, you see

Are an alien currency

Thanks for all this, oh and mate

Leave me a key by heaven's gate




Note: May the ‘Big Society’ be nailed for all time as what it is – a way of rolling back everything meritocratic and progressive that was achieved in the twentieth-century, especially after World War Two.