Justin Bieber's monkey

If I was truly talented, I would write an ode to Justin Bieber's monkey - use it as a metaphor for a trapped, performing animal snatched too young from its mother - a creature abandoned in some German airport – taken into custody by a uniformed official like a jibbering refugee. Poor Bieber. Poor monkey. Apparently, he only has four friends (Bieber, not the monkey) - real friends, not his millions of followers on Twitter. Bieber late for his own concert - late for his own bedtime. Snatching a kebab when he should be in bed. Sometimes Bieber looks like a monkey. The city does not seem to be his natural milieu. See the fear shine in his eyes. He slouches like a missing link, his trousers half-down. The fire of his celebrity is burning him. Where does monkey end and Bieber begin? Free Bieber! Release him into the wild!